


Always with Me

by I_Write_Tragedies_Not_Sins



Category: Sen to Chihiro no Kamikakushi | Spirited Away
Genre: Angst, F/M, Multi, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-04-07
Packaged: 2018-05-29 02:31:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6355330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_Write_Tragedies_Not_Sins/pseuds/I_Write_Tragedies_Not_Sins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seven years after the events of Spirited Away, Chihiro is called back to save Haku from the mad Yubaba's plans. But will her heart be stolen by another in  the meantime or will she reunite with Haku in a loving embrace?</p><p>What started out as a silly idea my girlfriend wanted,  has turned into a rather fun project. First time writing in this fandom.  Title taken from the ending theme song.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Remembering You- A Prologue

"You can't do this, Yubaba," Haku growls, struggling against his restraints.

The witch grins, chuckling. The sounds is low and cruel and Haku shivers despite himself. "Your contract may no longer be valid since that _human_ told you your name," she replies, turning away. "But I'm not giving you up that easily, Haku."

"Let me go," he spits back, chains biting deep into his wrists as he struggles. His eyes are narrowed as he looks at his former master, heart racing beneath his chest. He tries to call up his magic, but her spell has sapped it all from him.

She doesn't answer him, just continues walking away, her long white hair tied into a bun atop her large head. Haku's heart sinks as the door clicks shut. He's trapped. And as the darkness surrounds him, his thoughts turn to _her_. Her bright smile, the way her ponytail would sway as she ran... Her pure sincerity.

He whispers her name, wishing she was still here. It had killed him to send her back to the human side of the river, even as he knew it was the right thing to do. "Chihiro," he whispers her name and it sounds like a prayer, lost alone in a dank and dark dungeon. "Chihiro," and he prays somehow she'll return, so that he can hold her again. Even if it's only one last  time. "Chihiro."

  
~*~*~

"Chihiro!" a voice cries out, and Chihiro spins around, eyes wide, looking for the source. "Chihiro, over here!" Isuzu calls again, long black hair tied into pigtails as she bounces frantically on the balls of her feet.

"I guess I was imagining things again," Chihiro mumbles to herself. "Hello, Isuzu," she calls back, waving to her best friend.

A boy walks up behind Isuzu, long sandy brown hair falling to his shoulders as he stares at Chihiro. His face is pale white, like a winter's snow, and he wears a long, strange black robe that covers his whole body. Strange markings, that look like burn scars, make a triangular pattern on his face. He walks toward her, ignoring the blaring traffic racing down the road.

"Wait, sir, be careful!" Chihiro calls out, waving her hands frantically. She breaths a sigh of relief when he makes it safely to the other side, her heartbeat returning to normal. He stares down at her, unblinking, his deep black eyes boring into hers. A light grey colour encircles the iris, a haunting look, as he watches her. "Sen," he whispers, and she frowns up at him, confused.

"I'm sorry sir, that's not my name."

He frowns too, and she can't tell if he's mimicking her or if he's genuinely frowning. He slips a gloved hand from his silken  robes, gesturing at her with an empty palm. "Ahh, Ahh," he says, still meeting her eyes.

She shakes her head. "I don't want anything sir. Is something wrong?" she asks, turning her head slightly to look for Isuzu.

"You don't remember me, Sen?" he asks, bowing his head so that his hair hides his face. "This makes me sad."

"I think you're confused sir. My name isn't Sen."

She turns a bit more, still trying to catch a glimpse of Isuzu. The boy lunges forward grabbing her shoulders and staring at her hair. "Your hair ribbon..."

She struggles to escape his grasp. "Do you like it, sir?" She reaches up and takes it out, letting her brown hair fall to her shoulders. "Here, you can have it, if you like it."

"Sen, you must remember. Where did you get that hair ribbon?" His eyes are pleading, begging, desperate. 

Chihiro frowns, staring at the ribbon for a moment. It's bright purple hue has never faded, even in seven years of constant wear. She furrows her brow, trying to remember where she had gotten it, or why she feels she should always wear it. Flashes come to her, in bright vivid colours across her mind. A tiny mouse, running fast on a spinning wheel. A man with no face. An old woman with bespectacled, kind eyes. And a dragon that made her heart soar.

"I remember!" she bursts out, tears falling from her eyes. "It was real, it was really real! I'm so sorry I forgot, Kaonashi," she says, placing a hand on No Face's cheek.

He closes his eyes, cupping her hand with his. The corners of his lips tug upwards in a small smile as they stand there.  "Oh Sen, I have missed you," he whispers, and her cheeks turn a bright pink at the intimacy in his tone.

Her heart skips a beat beneath her breast she she stares up at his face. "What happened? You look so different."

His eyes flutter open. "Zeniba did this, so that I could come to tell you."

She wipes the tears from her face with her free hand, wondering why he has come to the human world. "Tell me what? Why isn't Haku here?" She frowns as she thinks of him , her heart falling at the realization he hasn't come for her. She misses him, so much her heart had blocked off all memories of that time, to save herself the constant ache of missing him.

No Face lets out a soft sigh, releasing her hand to fall back at her side. "Haku is in danger. Yubaba has gone mad." There's a sadness in his eyes that she can't understand, something so terribly lonely that it makes her heart crack under the weight of his gaze.

"Haku? He's in danger? I can't let anything happen to him," she says, gripping his robes in her fists. "Please, we have to help him!" She knows she sounds desperate, but she needs to save him. Haku, the boy who had made her heart flutter like butterfly wings even when she was only ten. The boy who had saved her life, and who's life she had saved in return. "Please."

He bows his head again, hair falling forward to cover his face once more. "That is why Zeniba sent me. But, her magic can't send you back again, if you come to the spirit world with me."

The realization on his words hit her hard, knocking her back as her mind spins. She steps back a bit more, eyes taking in the sights of the city. The bustling people, loud and laughing, as they roam the sidewalks. The buildings so tall, like metal hands reaching to touch a grey sky clouded by toxic fumes and smoke.  Her mind turns to thoughts of her parents, and all their hopes and dreams for her future. Isuzu, her dear friend with a bright and bubbly personality, and how worried she would be if she disappeared. How worried her family would be made her pulse beat like mad in her throat. She takes a deep breath, mind made up.

She bows low to No Face, clutching the brightly coloured hair ribbon in her hand. "If you'll excuse me," she says, voice firm. "I'd like to say goodbye to my friend before we go."

 


	2. Searching For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm using the Japanese name for No Face, Kaonashi, as it reads like an actual name more than No Face does. 
> 
> This story also decided to go a bit darker than I had planned. Sorry?

Chihiro's eyes are wide as she takes in the sights around her. The grass is bright green and tickles her toes as she walks barefoot across the plains. She can see Granny's house in the distance, small and sweet just the way she remembers it. She pauses, closing her eyes, as the summer wind blows her hair. She takes in a deep breath, the smell of cherry blossoms fragrant and blooming.

"Sen?" Kaonashi asks, grabbing her shirt sleeve in his hand.

She blinks up at him, cheeks turning bright pink at the obvious concern in his eyes. "Are you okay?" he whispers. 

She nods, brushing a strand of hair from his eyes. "I'm nervous, I guess," she replies.  

He grabs her hand, lacing their fingers together and smiling in his soft, gentle-natured way. "Don't worry, Sen. Granny's missed you, too. She'll keep us safe for now." 

She takes a deep breath, squaring her shoulders.  _Alright, Chihiro. You can do this. You have to. For Haku. He needs you._ She reaches for the doorknob and the wood is warm to the touch. "Granny? It's me, Chih- Sen!" she calls out, entering into a dark lit room. A flickering candle is the only source of light, and Chihiro squints against the darkness. Kaonashi lights the lamp and Chihiro screams. 

Blood covers the walls, morbidly staining the cheery and brightly painted wood. The loom where her friends had made her hair ribbon lies broken and splintered, the thread in a tangled heap of disarray. Chihiro falls to her knees, a strangled cry ripping itself from her lips as she hits the ground with a thud. She grips her hair in hands, shaking her head back and forth in horror as her eyes search for Zeniba. "Granny? Granny!" she screams, praying she'll answer. 

She looks at Kaonashi with wide, tearfilled eyes, heart racing beneath her chest. "What's happening?" she whispers, voice small and full of fear. 

He shakes his head, confusion clouding his gaze. "I- " He falls to the ground gripping his throat, eyes bulging. "Ahhh, ahhh."  

"Kaonashi? Kaonashi!" Chihiro screams his name, hands trembling as she scrambles over him, slipping in the copious amounts of blood on the floor. "No, please, you have to be okay!" 

His face somehow grows even paler, turning a sickly shade of grey as he gasps for breath. "Somethings... wrong here," he manages to get out. 

She grabs hold of him, lifting him to his feet. "Then we have to get you out of here." She struggles to drag her friend to the door, a heavy weight suddenly weighing her down, trying to force her back to her knees. She bites her lip, refusing to give up as she continues to tug and pull until they reach the door. Her foot goes to cross the threshold when  it slams shut and an evil laughter echos in the room. "No!" she shouts, dropping Kaonashi and tugging at the door. It doesn't budge no matter how hard she pulls. She leans her forehead against it, tears falling down her cheeks. She can hear Kaonashi still gasping for breath behind her. Everything seems hopeless as she rests against Zeniba's door, a dark weight on her shoulders. 

 _Chihiro...._  

She spins around, eyes wide, trying to find who had whispered her name. "Haku? Haku, are you here?" She shakes her head, still crying. "Oh, Haku, I'm so scared. What do I do?" She looks around and sees a window, bright red blood staining its surface and casting an eerie red glow on the ground. She frowns, looking around the room for a heavy object. Grabbing a piece of the splintered loom, she marches over to the window, jaw set in a hard line. "Don't worry, Kaonashi. I'll get us out of here." She swings with all her might, shattering the glass. It sprays outward and she grins, knocking out the bits that remained on the bottom part of the window. She runs back to grab Kaonashi, heart still pounding. "Come on, you have to help me. I can't lift your weight on my own, okay?" 

He nods, gripping her shoulder with his hand, breath coming in ragged pants. Slowly, they make their way over to the window. She bends low, linking her fingers together as he places a slippered foot against her palms. With a hefty grunt, she struggles to push her friend up and out the window, legs shaking under his weight. With a final "oomph" she hears him tumble to the grass. She looks over, and frowns to see him covered in tiny cuts from the shattered glass on the ground. He gives her a weak smile, though, breath coming normally. 

She breathes a sigh of relief. "You're going to be okay," she whispers, before pulling herself on the window and falling out into Kaonashi's waiting arms.  

"Sen?" he asks, cradling her in his grasp, brows furrowed as he looks down at her.  His body is warm as he holds her and she can feel her cheeks heating up in response.  

She shifts, motioning for him to put her down. "I'm fine," she mumbles, glancing back at the house as her feet touch the grass. "But what about Granny? Do you think she's okay?" 

Kaonashi lifts his gaze to look toward the horizon before letting out a soft sigh. "I don't know." 

And that's the only answer either of them have.  _We're all alone now. How are we going to save Haku without Granny?_

  
~*~*~ 

 

Unfettered rage pulses through Yubaba's body, boiling hot under her skin. She paces her opulent office, fire pouring from her mouth, which is opened in a snarl. "You may have one last time, Sen, but you won't defeat me so easily this time." She glances over at Bôh's now empty room and her rage doubles as she screams. Her bouncing green heads flinch at the sound and she throws her bucket of gold pieces at the wall, heart thundering like a rampaging bull. 

That filthy human had taken everything from her. "Come to the bathhouse, Sen. I'm waiting for you." She whispers the words, but the magic behind them is loud and fierce, like a freight train blaring in dead silence.

 

~*~*~

 

Haku lets out a sigh, his wrists sore and bleeding from the chafing of the hard metal chains. His stomach rumbles, hunger tearing at his senses. As hopelessness overwhelms him, his eyes flutter close. In his dreams, he can see her again. Her smile is like the sun, beautiful and strong. In his dreams, he holds her, watches her eat onigiri again, only this time she's smiling instead of crying. Her skin is soft as a flower petal against his fingertips, a blissful dream he can never have. 

The dungeon is dark and lonely and he whispers her name again, a broken prayer lost to night.

 

~*~*~

 

Chihiro walks with Kaonashi along the broken, rusted railroad tracks. Vines twist in and out of the metal ties. "How long ago did the train stop running?" Chihiro asks, shivering in the sun's dying light. 

Kaonashi looks straight ahead, unblinking. "I'm not sure. It seems like it's always been this way." 

 _Did Lin ever ride the train, escape the bathhouse?_ She wonders, but the question dies before she can utter it. She's too afraid the answer might be "no." She rubs her hands up and down her arms, a coldness sinking into her skin.  _I want to go home._ But she can't. She never can. She's here forever now, whether or not she saves Haku. Her mind drifts to him, remembering the way his hands felt so warm in hers as they fell from the sky, hearts linked by an unexplainable bond. She falters as her heart skips a beat, tears falling from her large brown eyes again. She drops to her knees, covering her face with her hands. 

A warm hand rests on her back, rubbing in small circles. "Sen?" Kaonashi murmurs, voice hesitant. 

"Oh, Kaonashi. What if we can't save Haku? I'm so scared something terrible's happened to him," she explains through her tears. 

His arms wrap around her in a tender embrace as he whispers into her hair. "We'll find a way, Sen. Because you want to, we'll find a way." 

She clings to him as she cries, fear and exhaustion taking over. His arms are warm and comforting, holding her tightly in his grasp. Her murmurs reassuring words in to her ear as they sit there together in the tall grasses, a tangle of legs and limbs. His lips press the softest of kisses to the top of her head. She sniffs, pulling back and wiping the tears from her face. "Kaonashi, you're so kind to comfort me like this."  

He just smiles, touching her cheek with his hand as they sit, barely a breath apart. "We should find somewhere to camp for the night, before the water comes in," he replies. 

She nods, returning his smile. "Yes, you're right. I can't sit here crying all night, or we'll never save Haku." 

His smile slips a little at her words before forming again. "Right. Come on, Sen." He rises to his feet and reaches for her hand. "Let's save Haku."


	3. Spirited Dreams

Chihiro stands in the middle of a lake, the ground cold under her feet. There's nothing but black water for miles upon miles and the island she stands upon is barely big enough for her. "Haku! Haku, where are you?" she yells, cupping her hands around her mouth and staring out into the darkness. "Haku, I'm scared," she whispers, shoulders drooping.

A soft splashing sound echos around her and she struggles to see in the dark. A bright light is in the distance. Chihiro squints, trying to see what it is. "Haku? Is that you?" More splashing echos as watches a glowing lantern on a metal pole bouncing toward her, walking across the water.

She scrambles back as it grows near but cries out as her foot steps in water and she nearly falls. She can't tell how deep it it, only that it seemingly goes on forever. Chihiro looks behind her and is surprised to see more of the lanterns coming, glowing softly in the darkness until they surround her.

Chihiro bows, turning to each lantern. "What are you? Where's Haku?" she asks, trembling despite the warmth of the air.

"Mottainai, mottinai!" The lanterns all chant together, deep voices that hurt her ears.

She clamps her hands over her ears. "Please, that hurts," she shouts.

"Mottainai, mottainai, mottainai!" 

A hand shakes her shoulder and she sits up with a gasp, eyes wide as she stares at Kaonashi's face. His brow is furrowed as he looks at her. "Sen, are you okay? You were thrashing in  your sleep," he says, and she can hear the worry in his voice.

"It was just a dream," she whispers, taking a deep breath. "It seemed so real."

He nods, sitting back on the heels of his feet as he squats beside her. "I'll protect you, Sen," he replies, offering her a small smile.

Chihiro smiles back, wiping the sleep from her eyes. "I'll feel much better once we find Haku," she says.

Kaonashi frowns at her. "With Zeniba gone, Haku might already be dead."

"No!" She screams the word, shaking her head as grief tears at her like a dragon's claw sinking its talons deep in to her heart. "No, I'd feel it, he can't be dead!" Tears threaten to spill from her eyes so she squeezes them shut against the pain.

Kaonashi places his hand under her chin. The glove is soft like silk and cool against her skin. She opens her eyes, looking deep into his with their faces so close together she can feel his breath against her lips. "Even if he's gone, Sen, I'm here. Am I not enough?"

She licks her lips, tears falling down her cheeks. "I have to save him," she replies, not answering his question.

Her frowns and tears his hand away from her. "Fine," he snaps, getting up and walking away.

Chihiro sighs and flops back down, the grass soft beneath her. She stares up at the stars, tears leaking from the corner of her eyes. "Haku, please be okay," she whispers to the night. A heavy weight settles into the pit of her stomach, a hard lump of pain and fear all tangled together. She only survived this place the last time because of Haku. Without him, she feels lost, and so alone. Her heart skips a beat. He can't really be dead, can he? River spirits can't die.

 

~*~*~

 

Haku's mouth is dry, his lips chapped and bleeding. A terrible ache of hunger gnaws at his stomach like broken glass. His bones grow, making popping noises in the dark. He screams as his skin stretches, pain unlike anything he's ever felt ripping through his entire body as he hangs from the wall. His throat is raw as the screams bounce off the walls, echoing back at him.

The door creaks open and the light that follows Yubaba into the room burns his eyes. "What are you doing to me?" he croaks out, each word bringing him further pain as he struggles to speak against invisible bonds on his tongue.

Yubaba chuckles, the sound full of more malice than he's ever heard from her. "I'm aging you, my dear Haku. Slowly, you'll age jut like a human except you can't die. In a few months, you'll be an old man. By the end of the year, you'll be nothing more than bones, waiting to dance for your master."

"You... can't...."

She frowns, moving her hand in a motion he's seen before. A loud smack echos as pain shoots across his jaw. "I can't? Haku, you've forgotten. I'm the only one with the power now."

 

~*~*~

 

Chihiro walks along the railroad tracks again, chewing on her lip as she goes. She glances up at Kaonashi's back as they go before letting out another sigh. A warm breeze blows her hair, smelling of sweet jasmine. She stops, clenching her fists and closing her eyes. "Kaonashi," she shouts. "Please don't be mad at me, I'm sorry!" She bows in his direction, keeping her eyes shut.

The swishing of his robes tells her that he's coming closer. A heavy hand touches her head, softly patting it as they stand their. "Sen," he says, and she strands up, looking into his deep, warm eyes. He doesn't say anything else, just looks at her with an expression so sad and full of longing that it breaks her heart.

"Kaonashi, what is it that you want?" she asks, not even certain what she's asking, or why.

He takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly through his lips. "Nothing I am allowed to have," he replies, brushing his knuckles against her cheek. "Why do you ask?"

Chihiro grabs his robe in one hand, brows furrowed. "You look so sad," she whispers. "I- I want you to smile."

"I can only smile when you do, Sen."

"Then I'll have to smile all the time, so you can be happy, Kaonashi."

He leans forward and rests his forehead against her, letting out a small sigh. "You want to find Haku. I know somewhere we should look," he says, voice softer than she's ever heard it. 

She smiles pulling away slightly. "You'll still help me find him?"

Kaonashi nods, smiling back though the corners of his lips seem to waver. "I will."


End file.
